Evelyn: “The Audacity”

Listen on: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts | Anchor | Breaker | Castbox | Overcast | Pocket Casts | Radio Public

Don’t see your platform of choice? Click play above!

God grant us the confidence of a mediocre white man.

Join us this time to enter the mind of a rare male Austen protagonist, the luckiest guy in the world. We'll also take you through some of the historical and psychological context that may have gotten him to this point...

Transcript

Emily: This is Reclaiming Jane, an Austen podcast for fans on the margins.

Lauren: I'm Lauren Wethers.

Emily: And I'm Emily Davis-Hale.

Lauren: And today, we're reading Evelyn.

[intro music]

Emily: Another banger from young Jane Austen, I've gotta say.

Lauren: This was, um, short and sweet. Thankfully, we were not left with an unfinished plot, so I did not have to dig up Jane Austen's remains and demand that she finish this. But this was delightfully entertaining. I enjoyed it.

Emily: No need to resort to a little light necromancy.

Lauren: No, no, no, not this time. I, I will probably have to save that for, um, for future Juvenilia.

Emily: We'll see how it pans out.

Lauren: Yeah, we shall see. I'm even saltier now that I was the one who had to recap last time because you get a piece that's only about seven pages.

Emily: It's so easy too! It's very straightforward.

Lauren: This is so easy! I was really fighting for my life last time. And you get like the most simple recap of all time. So I'm not - not to set the bar too high, but I'm really expecting great things from you today.

Emily: Okay. All right. I don't have, you know, multiple romps around the country to narrate. So I hope I can handle it.

Lauren: I hope so too, my friend.

[both laugh]

Lauren: All right. Let me put 30 seconds on the clock. Emily, are you prepared to recap Evelyn?

Emily: I'm so prepared.

Lauren: All right. On your mark, get set, go.

Emily: This traveler, Mr. Gower, arrives in the practically perfect village of Evelyn and immediately decides that he absolutely has to live there. Um, he is directed to the Webb family, who straight up just give him their estate and their daughter's hand in marriage, plus like a hundred pounds on top of that.

Um, he is so happy that he completely forgets he was supposed to be getting a portrait for his sister of her dead fiancé. Um, but. She, she has also died in the meantime, um, and the dead fiancé's father is very annoyed at Mr. Gower.

Lauren: The end!

Emily: Okay.

Lauren: You had half a second to spare.

Emily: [laughing] I do what I can.

Lauren: Oh my goodness, I definitely thought by reading the title that we were going to get a story about a main character called Evelyn, but it turns out that Evelyn is the town.

Emily: Yeah, I had the same bait and switch as last time, because I thought for some reason that Lesley Castle would be the name of a person, despite it having, I don't know, I thought Castle was going to be a surname. No idea why.

Lauren: Okay, fair enough.

Emily: But yeah, definitely even more surprised this time that Evelyn was the name of the village.

Lauren: And we actually have a male main character, which I feel like is few and far between in Jane Austen texts.

Emily: Very rare from Miss Austen.

Lauren: We have a brief break from entering the lives and minds of women to enter the life of a very lucky and, uh, very forgetful man.

Emily: Oh my goodness, but we'll get to that.

Lauren: We'll, we'll get, we'll get to his forgetfulness later.

Emily: The first thing we're exposed to is the utter solicitousness of the dear residents of Evelyn, because Mr. Gower arrives, uh, on horseback and goes to the alehouse, and the landlady there, who as well as everyone else in Evelyn, was remarkably amiable, uh, has to unfortunately let him know that there's not a single house in the village that can be rented to him. They're simply not available.

Lauren: And this is potentially the worst news this man has ever gotten in his life. At least we're led to believe at this point in time.

Emily: He's been in town for like five minutes and finds out that he can't move there immediately. So "he turned from her in visible agitation. What a situation am I in, he said to himself as he watched the window and threw up the sash."

Lauren: He is in agonizing pain of doubt and suspense. Won't we take pity on this man's poor nerves?

Emily: And his, his horrible agitation is what convinces this landlady that, well, she has to do something for him. She asks, "Is there anything, sir, in my power to do that may relieve your griefs? Tell me in what manner I can soothe them, and believe me that the friendly balm of comfort and assistance shall not be wanting, for indeed, sir, I have a sympathetic soul."

Lauren: And these words almost bring Mr. Gower to tears. How polite and how amiable is this woman? What an offer. This is incredible.

Emily: "What would I not give to be your neighbor to be blessed with your acquaintance and with the farther knowledge of your virtues?"

Lauren: "Best of women," which of course, it always makes me think - it's an allusion to the best of men, which is from Sir Charles Grandison, which is referenced throughout this text, but it always makes me think of Hamilton, Best of Wives and Best of Women.

Emily: Same. Every time.

Lauren: I know they're pulling from the same source material, but that's all I can hear in my head.

Emily: But because he is simply so put out at the idea of not being having any way to live in Evelyn, she eventually directs him to the Webb family, who, "though warmly attached to the spot, yet from a peculiar generosity of disposition, will perhaps be willing to oblige you with their house."

So he immediately sets off and finds this lovely estate sitting in the middle of a paddock. Um, it's got very fashionable landscaping and he arrives, asks whether the family are at home, is shown immediately into the dressing room, where they ply him with food and drink.

Lauren: And not just any food and drink, luxury food and drink. This is like the equivalent of you entering a stranger's home and them offering you top of the line caviar that costs like a thousand dollars.

Emily: This is the platonic opposite of what we saw in The Visit, where everything was humorously lowbrow. They start off with chocolate and a venison pasty, and then the lady of the house also orders some sandwiches and a basket of fruit and ices and soup and jellies and cakes.

Lauren: And then they're not done! So on top of this feast that they have just laid out for this perfect stranger who was just pulled up to their house with no warning, no, you know, previous relation or explanation. She also says, "Accept this, my good sir, believe me, you are welcome to everything that is in my power to bestow. I wish my purse were weightier, but Mr. Webb must make up my deficiencies. I know he has cash in the house to the amount of a hundred pounds, which he shall bring you immediately."

Mind you, I can't do a perfect calculation of what that is today. I used a couple different inflation calculators and got different answers, but the rough equivalent to 100 pounds, this would have been in 1772 when the story is set - it was written in 1791, but she says it happens about 20 years before, so we can assume the events of the story take place in about 1772. A hundred pounds in 2024, it would be about £12,837, which is about $16,627.

Emily: Wow, this man just walked up and said nothing. And they were like, take everything.

Lauren: Here you go.

Emily: And, um, he has no qualms about accepting this. And goes even further after dinner, when Mr. Webb asks "what else we can do to contribute to your happiness and express the affection we bear you, tell us what you wish more to receive and depend upon our gratitude for the communication of your wishes." So he straight up asks for their house.

Lauren: And it works.

Emily: Yeah.

Lauren: Which is the more incredible thing. And granted, the first neighbor who he spoke to did say that they have "a peculiar generosity of disposition." But when she said peculiar, I didn't know she meant this peculiar.

Emily: [laughs] Straight up strange.

Lauren: And the way he asked for it, too, is so funny, where he says, Well, "give me then your house and grounds. I ask for nothing else." Just a small request of you.

Emily: Mm hmm. And asking for nothing else is immediately contradicted when the young ladies of the house also arrive, and he asks to marry their oldest daughter and have a "handsome portion," which is her dowry. And they, of course, immediately agree. And they're like, oh, we're so sorry, she only has £10,000, which, again, an absurd amount of money. And he's like, oh, that's fine, that'll do.

Lauren: I suppose I can live off of such a meager living.

Emily: "This objection being instantly removed by the generosity of Mr. Gower, who declared himself satisfied with the sum mentioned. Mr. and Mrs. Webb, with their youngest daughter, took their leave." Of their own house. And on the next day, the nuptials of their eldest with Mr. Gower were celebrated. Which, as we have discussed before in conversation on marriage traditions, is not possible, except by like special dispensation from a bishop.

Lauren: That's not really how that works. That's why couples were riding off to Gretna Green.

Emily: Exactly!

Lauren: You can't just decide to get married tomorrow. It does not work that way.

Emily: Yep. Luckily, in the Juvenilia, it works this way.

Lauren: Yeah, in the Juvenilia, it does. And if you're as lucky as Mr. Gower, it works that way for you.

Emily: I mean, everything is turning up Frederick Gower.

Lauren: Oh, yeah.

Emily: "This amiable man now found himself perfectly happy, united to a very lovely and deserving young woman with a handsome fortune, an elegant house, settled in the village of Evelyn, and by that means, enabled to cultivate his acquaintance with Mrs. Willis. Could he have a wish ungratified?"

Lauren: Well, it turns out he can. It does take him a couple months. However, he is rudely reminded of his original reason for traveling when something as simple as a rose comes across his path as he's walking around the paddock with his beautiful young wife.

Emily: This fallen rose reminds him that he was actually passing through Evelyn originally on an errand for his sister Rose, "the thirteenth daughter of a very large family."

Lauren: And she's apparently, you know, the apple of everyone's eyes, she's such a beautiful, wonderful young woman, but she fell in love with someone whose parents did not think that she'd be a prudent match for this young man, uh, who was a very high rank. His family has very high expectations for him, and they were not about to just let their son marry this random woman, doesn't matter how pretty she is, who did not live up to their expectations of what standards they have for their son's wife.

Emily: And when he makes it clear that he's not interested in marrying any other young lady, they ship him off to the Isle of Wight to kind of cool him down a little bit. But alack and alas, he dies in a shipwreck on the way.

Lauren: Every single person on board of this boat dies. And as soon as the, the news reaches Carlisle, which is where the beautiful Rose was living, she was so affected by it that she truly, she lost the ability to function normally. And all that she wanted was a picture of her unfortunate lover. And it is on this mission that her brother has undertaken a journey into Sussex and promptly got sidetracked because of how wonderful Evelyn was.

Emily: He was going to personally petition the father of the deceased young man, a lord something or other, for an image of his son, uh, but never made it. Because he found this village that was just too lovely and just had to swindle a family out of their home and marry a woman.

Lauren: He was making his own fortunes, and he apparently was so excited and so enamored with that, that he forgot his sister even existed. And the rest of his family, for that matter.

Emily: Clearly! Because he immediately tries to make up for this grievous fault in himself, "agitated by grief, apprehension, and shame." And he writes to Rose, his sister:

"My dearest sister, as it is now four months since I left Carlisle, during which period I have not once written to you, you will perhaps unjustly accuse me of neglect and forgetfulness. Alas, I blush when I own the truth of your accusation."

I think that's not an unjust thing, then.

Lauren: No, a very quick contradiction.

Emily: "Yet, if you are still alive, do not think too harshly of me. Or suppose that I could for a moment forget the situation of my Rose." He forgot for four months. "Believe me, I will forget you no longer, but will hasten as soon as possible to the castle if I find by your answer that you are still alive. Maria joins me in every dutiful and affectionate wish, and I am yours sincerely, Frederick Gower."

Lauren: And so he waits for a response, and as soon as the letter can traverse the distance from Carlisle to Evelyn, it arrives, but it is not from Rosa, it is from a different one of his sisters, and it reads,

"Dear Brother, My mother has taken the liberty of opening your letter to poor Rose, as she has been dead these six weeks. Your long absence and continued silence gave us all great uneasiness and hastened her to her grave. Your journey to the castle, therefore, may be spared. You do not tell us where you have been since the time of your quitting Carlisle, nor in any way account for your tedious absence, which gives us some surprise. We all unite in compliments to Maria and beg to know who she is."

Emily: This man...

Lauren: [laughing] Oh my god, the drama.

Emily: He just disappears for months on end and they are presumably all like, well, he's dead, I guess.

Lauren: They have no reason to expect anything else, especially if he had previously been a regular correspondent and all of a sudden he doesn't respond for four months. It would be reasonable to assume he's either grievously injured or dead.

Emily: And indeed, on receipt of this letter from his other sister, he is attacked by a fit of the gout, brought on by his guilt at causing his sister's premature death.

Lauren: So, so severe is this that even in a town where illness is rarely heard of, he's still overcome with this illness.

Emily: When he finally recovers, under the loving ministrations of his wife, of course, he takes off as soon as he can to the castle where his sister's dead fiancé's family lives, "wishing to find whether his lordship, softened by his son's death, might have been brought to consent to the match had both he and Rosa been alive."

So basically, he's just thundering off to demand of this man, now that both these young lovers are dead, if they lived, would you consent?

Lauren: It's the weirdest hypothetical ever.

Emily: It's so weird! And he has to go in person, apparently.

Lauren: I mean, I feel like if he already was on the mission to go in person, you might as well just finish it out at that point. You already really screwed your people over, so the least you can do is get on a horse.

Emily: I guess so. So he arrives late in the evening and immediately finds quibbles with the situation of the building.

Lauren: He doesn't dislike the situation, but it was certainly inferior to that of his own house.

Emily: Of course. "There was an irregularity in the fall of the ground, and a profusion of old timber which appeared to him ill suited to the style of the castle. For it being a building of a very ancient date, he thought it required the paddock of Evelyn Lodge to form a contrast and enliven the structure." Man has architectural opinions.

Lauren: Evidently, now that he's been a homeowner for four months, he has all of the best ideas about landscaping, architecture, home improvement. Learned by osmosis, I guess.

Emily: I suppose so. So he is admitted to the castle, suffering no compunctions about presenting himself to this family of incredibly high rank.

Lauren: He's afraid of the dark, but not of ingratiating himself with people with whom he does not belong.

Emily: Yeah, absolutely. And he immediately demands answers from this lord, who is just shocked and appalled by the appearance of this random man whose sister he would not let his own son marry, and is like, what is the point of you asking me this? Are you kidding me?

Lauren: And the rest of the people who are looking on are also convinced that he's out of his mind. He asks it in a very convoluted way. [laughs] He says, "My lord, you are perhaps surprised at receiving a visit from a man whom you could not have the least expectation of seeing here. But my sister, my unfortunate sister, is the real cause of my thus troubling you. That luckless girl is now no more, and though she can receive no pleasure from the intelligence, yet for the satisfaction of her family I wish to know whether the death of this unhappy pair has made an impression on your heart sufficiently strong to obtain that consent to their marriage, which in happier circumstances you would not be persuaded to give, supposing that they now were both alive."

Emily: "His lordship seemed lost in astonishment."

Lauren: [laughing] Yeah!

Emily: I wonder why! "'Mr. Gower,' replied his lordship. 'This is a very odd question. It appears to me that you are supposing an impossibility. No one can more sincerely regret the death of my son than I have always done, and it gives me great concern to know that Miss Gower's was hastened by his. Yet to suppose them alive is destroying at once the motive for a change in my sentiments concerning the affair.'"

Lauren: To which Mr. Gower gets very angry, which makes no sense, but then again, nothing about his behavior has made sense, so we continue. He says, "My lord, I see that you are a most inflexible man, and that not even the death of your son can make you wish his future life happy." And he storms away and bids them all goodnight.

Emily: He quickly overcomes his fear of the dark to ride at a gallop all the way back to Evelyn.

Lauren: And that's it. That's the end of the story. Oh, the audacity of this man!

Emily: Truly every moment, every interaction he has is just carried out in utter confidence that his preferences will sway the day.

Lauren: God grant me the confidence of a mediocre white man.

Emily: Truly.

Lauren: That's, this story is the epitome of that. Just asking for things that you don't deserve and don't need, and somehow it works. And also forgetting about all the people who care about you along the way, which also feels fitting.

Emily: Yeah, incredible. So yeah, I definitely see how Jane Austen is poking fun at these kinds of people who have complete unearned faith in their own ability to prevail. But, uh, there's also definitely some barbs thrown at the overly solicitous, like the landlady and the Webb family who are all too happy to immediately give over to whatever request this man makes, for literally no reason.

Lauren: None at all. And there's no indication that they have anywhere else to go, or that they have any kind of trust in their future circumstances, but they're all too happy to be paid the compliment that someone loves their home so much that he wishes to purchase it from them. And not even purchase, they just give it to him as a gift. They make no money off of this exchange.

Emily: And then also pay their daughter's dowry.

Lauren: Yeah. And thank him for taking their daughter off of their hands. Who knows where they go, but you know, she's fine.

Emily: It's of no consequence. Who cares? It's all about Frederick Gower.

Lauren: How to begin, like, processing any of the events of the story?

Emily: I know. This is one of those situations where I wish that I had the cultural and literary context that Austen seems to be drawing on. Because several of the footnotes mention Sir Charles Grandison, the novel. And now I'm like, well, do I need to go, read Sir Charles Grandison? since she's evidently referring to it at several points.

Lauren: I'm not entirely sure the different, like you said, the different tropes or plot points that she's satirizing. And I enjoy it without that. But I feel like I would, my enjoyment would be elevated if I really understood everything that she's kind of poking fun at or referencing within these seven, nine pages.

Emily: Definitely. As it is, you know, if you have a strong enough suspension of disbelief, which, perhaps is part of what she's mocking here, is how strongly you have to suspend your disbelief to just accept all of the events like this. That someone would just roll into town and say, well, this is where I'm gonna live, and then kick a family out of their house with thanks for doing so.

Lauren: Is this how colonialists feel? [both laugh] Is this the revised history of events?

Emily: Honestly...

Lauren: It's like, no, no, no, no. They were happy. They were grateful to me that I wanted their home. They saw it as an honor. And then I just kept asking for more things, and they just kept giving it to me. It really just worked out in my favor.

Emily: This is actually just Austen's retelling of the Thanksgiving dinner.

Lauren: It is!

Emily: He shows up and they ply him with the best food and drink that they have, and then they say, oh, just take our land. It's fine. We love you so much.

Lauren: We don't have anywhere else to go, but that's fine! You need a place. It doesn't matter that you came from somewhere and could very easily just go back. You can take this one. Maybe the real answer was she was satirizing colonialism all along! [laughs] That was a joke. I know that's not true. For the record.

Emily: Seasonally appropriate for an episode coming out in November.

Lauren: Very true.

Emily: If you're an American, at least.

Lauren: Correct. Yeah. Those are the events of Evelyn. It's quite a short story, but an entertaining one, nonetheless.

Emily: Absolutely.

Lauren: And do you have anything else that you want to add, or do you want to tell us about your historical connection for today?

Emily: Yeah, this was such a straightforward story that I don't think I have anything further to say.

Lauren: Excellent. Well, then, I'm interested to hear what our historical connection is today.

Emily: This was one of those stories that was a little difficult to pull out one thing, because anything I chose would be so small as to be nearly inconsequential. Um, I almost accidentally talked about windows a second time on this podcast. But ultimately decided to investigate the circumstances of the death of the young nobleman that Rose was intending to marry. Because his family sends him off to the Isle of Wight, which they refer to as a foreign country.

Lauren: So far away.

Emily: Very heavy air quotes there. The Isle of Wight is actually the second most populous island in England. It is, it is England.

Lauren: No, it's not. It's a foreign country!

Emily: Yeah, sure, sure, sure. Um, yeah, the Isle of Wight is, it's been occupied at least since the Mesolithic period, so very, very far back, many thousands of years, um, and underwent similar shifts of political control to the rest of southern England - it's politically kind of all of a piece there. During the Georgian era, it was still part of the county of Hampshire, but is now its own separate governing entity, and historically has been a critical location for the defense of Portsmouth and Southampton. We've talked about Portsmouth's importance before during... Mansfield Park? Mansfield Park.

Lauren: Yes.

Emily: Because that's where Fanny Price is from.

Lauren: Correct.

Emily: I remember things about Jane Austen.

Lauren: Excellent memory.

Emily: Yeah. The isle has also been historically used as a staging point for troops during various conflicts with, you know, the French and Spanish, as England does, or did.

Lauren: It's on brand.

Emily: Mm hmm. It has always had a significant agricultural and maritime economy. It is now a major tourist economy as well, but that didn't really become a staple until the Victorian era, where its popularity as a vacation spot really blossomed. So in the Georgian era, when they were shipping this young nobleman off to the Isle of Wight, it definitely would have been a less prestigious thing. It's not like someone just going to Bath. Uh, you're not really sent away like that. It would have been a bit more of a going off to the, maybe not a backwater, but not a hub of society for sure.

Lauren: Meant to be a punishment.

Emily: Absolutely. The Isle of Wight is located between the English Channel and the Solent in the south of England, again, off that coast. Um, it's on a very commercially and recreationally active waterway, and is also the location of two coastal defense forts erected by Henry VIII, one of which is Calshott Castle, which is where this young nobleman was dashed upon the rocks and died.

Now, the footnote in our edition mentions an apparent lack of storms in the Solent. However, I discovered in my research that King James II was nearly shipwrecked in the Solent estuary in 1685. So it's not unheard of.

Lauren: Really? Wow.

Emily: But also I guess any place with a significant history of shipping activity is probably going to have some kind of shipwreck.

Lauren: Yeah, but not necessarily one that involves a king. That feels notable.

Emily: True. Definitely. So, the storms perhaps were unusual, uh, and spun up out of nowhere maybe just for the drama of this death. But, yeah, that's, that's a little bit about the Isle of Wight and the Solent where this poor young nobleman was sent away and tragically lost his life.

Lauren: May he rest in pieces.

Emily: [laughing] Ohh! Oof.

Lauren: [laughs] Sorry. Sorry, Rose. I didn't mean to say that about your man.

Emily: So yeah, just a little, a little detour.

Lauren: I appreciated that. Thank you.

Emily: What do you have for our pop culture connection today?

Lauren: I was thinking about how weirdly generous the Webbs were and, uh, just the weird positivity that seems to permeate all of Evelyn, like almost to like a Stepford Wive-ish extent. Um, and so I was thinking about overly positive characters and toxic positivity. And so there are some characters who I feel like we can draw a parallel to in popular media, who seem similar to the weirdly generous, kind, welcoming Webbs.

One of whom is from a show that I've referenced multiple times on this podcast is Chris Traeger from Parks and Recreation, where you - obviously like all of these characters are meant to be satirical in the way that they're written, but watching Chris Traeger in particular, you just get the sense that this man is not real, to the point where even the other characters in the show are looking at him like, you cannot possibly be this relentlessly positive all the time to the point that it's exhausting.

He enters the show later in the run. He's not an original character from the first season, but quickly becomes somebody who is a mainstay in the cast and usually acts as a foil to people like Ben Wyatt and other characters like Ron Swanson as well, who's just grumpy and wants nothing to do with anyone. Whereas Chris Traeger loves everyone. Everything is amazing. Isn't life so fantastic. I'm going to go run 26 miles in six minutes and then come back and do like 10 pushups. That's the vibe this man is on all the time, 24/7. It's exhausting.

Another one is Ted Lasso, um, of course from a show that is known for its relentless positivity, where even Ted himself has been told that maybe he's a little bit too positive and ends up in therapy for it, actually, once you get to season two. But he also has the trait of, or at least the character trait in the show of being the American amongst a bunch of droll British people.

And Americans also have, uh, cultural reputation of being overly happy all the time, which I did not realize until I started traveling more and started spending more time in online spaces that did not include just Americans, where they were wondering, why are you smiling all the time? Why do you seem to always be happy? This doesn't feel real. What is wrong with all of you? Why are you smiling all the time?

And Ted Lasso is that notion turned up to about a thousand. Um, he is always finding the bright side of things. Even when characters are yelling at him, he still manages to find a way to be positive, he is somebody who you could smack him and he would literally turn the other cheek and grin and say, Oh my gosh, wow, you put a lot of power behind that swing. Good job. Have you been like lifting weights? You've been working out?

And then finally, the last character who I will highlight is Joy from Inside Out, who is so relentlessly positive because it is truly the only emotion she can experience because she is truly only the emotion of joy. And if you've watched the first Inside Out, then you know that she needs the other emotions within the brain of, you know, her person, Riley, to make Riley a functional person who can relate to other people and who can ask for help and who can, you know, connect with people authentically. When it's just joy at driver's seat, Riley doesn't really get what she needs because she also needs things like fear and sadness to be a well rounded human being.

And so I was thinking about this and then thinking also about the concept of toxic positivity, which I kind of mentioned at the beginning as well. And that is the act of avoiding, suppressing, or rejecting negative emotions or experiences. So basically, having - or prioritizing positive thinking at the expense of all of your other feelings.

And although positivity is usually, at least again in American society, seen as something that is desirable, and something that you should uphold, um, again with this notion of, we're expected to be upbeat and smiling and happy in any situation, it is actually something, if we lean too far into that, that can be really harmful to us. There are things about being optimistic and positive that can be really psychologically healthy, but if it is at the expense of ignoring your other emotions or ignoring your other needs, it gets to be really draining and you're actually not being emotionally honest with yourself or the people around you, which can have mental and physical effects on you as well.

So when I was thinking about the Webbs who are so relentlessly kind that they make themselves homeless and just give this random man off the street, a hundred pounds or the equivalent of 12,000 pounds today, I was thinking about how you can actually be harmed by being too positive and too generous, even though those are traits that are in theory, things are that are desirous or that make you a quote unquote "good person," but sometimes it's okay to be a little bit of a Grinch. It actually might lead to some self preservation.

Emily: Absolutely.

Lauren: That's what we got today.

Emily: I love it. Yeah, I definitely was thinking of that sort of - like specifically that toxic generosity of, we will give away anything and everything that you want. You only have to ask for it. 'Cause yeah, I've definitely seen people in my life who are kind of like that and some of them are actively working to get over that, that instinct to just, if someone expresses even the most ambiguous desire for something or other, they're like, oh, we can make that happen. We can do that for you. And sometimes it's like, no, no, I was just, I was thinking a vague thing out loud. Don't, don't give me that or whatever. Like, I don't want the clothes off your back. I like your sweater. That's it. [laughs]

Lauren: That's all I said. That's all that I meant. It is also a pot calling the kettle black situation, because I've definitely been the type of person to say, Oh, it's okay, to where somebody else has had to call me out and say, It's sometimes not okay, and you need to stop saying that, or stop being so obedient about things. Sometimes I just want to be sad, and I needed that call out. Like, Oh, I didn't realize I was doing more harm than good by, like, not making space for sadness.

Emily: Yeah, I think that's a pretty common feature of especially, feminine socialization in American society, for sure, is being discouraged from expressing negative emotions. And so you internalize that and end up, as you said before, neglecting everything else that you might feel, which is not healthy.

Lauren: When you have random strangers telling you to smile on the subway, when you just have a neutral face, you eventually get the message that you're supposed to be happy all the time. That's supposed to be your default.

Emily: Yep.

Lauren: This is us giving you permission, random listener, to be a little bit of a bitch if you feel like it.

Emily: Seconded. Within reason, obviously.

Lauren: I said a little bit of a bitch, not a raging bitch.

Emily: Yes. [laughs] Although sometimes raging bitch is called for, you know what?

Lauren: Very true. I think that may just bring us to final takeaways.

Emily: Yeah, that was very short and sweet on all counts.

Lauren: Oh, "Short and Sweet," Sabrina Carpenter album. There's your bonus pop culture reference for today.

Emily: Well, since I recapped, that brings you up first for takeaway.

Lauren: It does indeed. I think that my final takeaway is not to become so wrapped up in yourself that you forget about the other people who are important to you.

Emily: That's real good. That's a very evident takeaway from this story.

Lauren: [laughs] I didn't really have to work that hard for that one. What about you? What's your final takeaway?

Emily: I'm still thinking of what you said about Stepford Wives. And my takeaway is not so much a lesson learned as an, I want to know what's going on in this village because something's off.

Lauren: Why is everyone so happy? And why are the Webbs even more happy?

Emily: I know. My takeaway is something ain't right with Evelyn.

Lauren: I agree. Maybe that's, okay, I take it back. I am digging up Jane Austen because I want to know what's going on in this town of Evelyn.

Emily: So we agree, a little light necromancy is back on the table.

Lauren: Yeah, it's back now. Jane Austen, come back here.

[outro music]

Lauren: Thank you for joining us in this episode of Reclaiming Jane. Next time we'll be reading Catherine, or the Bower.

Emily: To read our show notes or a transcript of this episode, check out our website, reclaimingjanepod.com, where you can also find the full back catalog and links to our social media.

Lauren: If you'd like to support us and gain access to exclusive content, you can join our Patreon at Reclaiming Jane Pod.

Emily: Reclaiming Jane is produced and co-hosted by Lauren Wethers and Emily Davis-Hale. Our music is by LaTasha Bundy, and our show art is by Emily Davis-Hale.

Lauren: See you next time, nerds.

[music ends]

Emily: I feel like the alternate title of this story could have been The Fucking Audacity.

Lauren: [laughs] It's too bad we can't have profanity in our episode title because maybe that's what it should have been.

Emily: I know!

Lauren: We could just put an asterisk...

Emily: Yeah.